Did you hate your dream job?

Welcome to adulthood.

2 phrases come to mind.  

1.  Work to live, don't live to work.

and

2.  The grass is not always greener on the other side.

These are things I've come to recognize.  You can have the best job ever, but if the pay isn't there, or you have to over commit time (work 60+ per week), you won't have the ability to enjoy your life.  Don't miss out.

Also, all companies tend to have problems.  They come in different packages.  So take a look and see if moving will actually help.  The higher you get the more even the best companies flaws will be revealed.  

With that being said, sometime a move makes things seem brighter, and allows you to step back and remove emotion from the workplace. My last job I was at 10 years, and found myself caring too much.  It caused me stress and made me a bear to live with.  My new job, I can look at objectively, strive to make the work place better, and enjoy my work again.  Best thing is that I can see it as my job, not my second family.  (Less emotionally tied to job vs family).

Hope some of this advice helps and good luck.

I would say part of this is "welcome to adulthood" but part is about how much you're willing to settle for or put up with. Many people are "okay" with making great money while despising their job. Many aren't. If you aren't, I would advise a few things:

Pick up a book on career change. I recently read Career Moves and it had a lot of golden nuggets about creating value for your organization (even if you hate your job and/or boss), developing a personal strategy for your next move, even the value in taking a lateral move to get where you want to be. 

Have a discussion with your manager, indicating you would like to explore other options where you can bring value to your organization. This could be staying in your current job but being appointed to a new committee (or what not), or could mean looking at other job roles to move into. You might be surprised at how the discussion goes. If your manager has no interest in your career growth and happiness, that's your sign. If he does, explore the options together.

Seek a mentor relationship with an executive at your current organization. It sounds cheeky and like homework, but I did this last year and it's been beneficial in ways I hadn't imagined, in terms of exposure and opportunities.

Make an effort, be more involved. I had a few years where I became visibly disengaged and my manager called me out on it. I decided to be more present, more involved - not only in day-to-day work, but in other things like organizing volunteer activities or luncheons for our team. Things like that can put you on the radar as an engaged employee, and set you up for other opportunities just from a visibility and image perspective.

I promise I don't work in HR, but I've recently went through almost this exact same scenario. This is what helped me turn around my attitude and perspective.

I took jobs that were available, none of them was a dream job.  I am retired now.  It is a pretty good job.  Every job I had was both good and bad.  I wanted to work, contribute to society, and make the most of what I considered to be my own considerable talent and training.  I felt responsible not to waste the gift.  There were always problems:  struggles with funding particularly making the work match the budget (even when it didn't), struggles with people, and struggles to do the work itself.  It was not easy work that just anyone could do.  In my case, when things were going poorly, I just worked more hours to get things to work out better.  Yes, the 60 to 80 hour work weeks, all-nighters, were part of the job for me.  I was motivated by wanting not to fail at anything.  I didn't necessarily like that part of the job but I felt like that I had to endure it.  These were the conditions for the kind of work I did.  My job skills were very specialized.  There weren't other jobs that would use my skills.  I understood that it was my choice to do it my way.  There were shortcuts I chose not to take.  When I walked away, I did so happily and haven't looked back.  I retired at 62. 

You cannot change others very much.  You can change yourself a bit.  The only thing I did to make life better was to be unfailingly upbeat.  My natural instinct is to be introverted, emotionally detached, and work alone.  But at work, I smiled, I inquired about co-worker's families and interests, I told stories and jokes.  I got pretty good treatment from most managers and co-workers because I was likable.  It helped me get through rough patches.  

You don't really describe the problem in specific terms and perhaps you should be circumspect. In your own mind, can you list three or four tasks you completed that made you feel good about your work? Can you isolate the specific people, types of tasks, or situations that are the problem? Can you shift toward tasks that are rewarding and away from the people, tasks, situations you do not like?  You have to be pretty clear and specific on the details in your own mind about what it is you like and do not like about a job to change effectively.  Can you make the atmosphere around you at work more positive by making yourself more positive?  

If you cannot effect a positive change by staying in place, you will have to find a new job.  There are lots of ways to make a living.  It amazes me what activities people can turn into a livelihood.  The internet has really broadened what is possible to do for a living.   Look around and do some market research.  See where else you might put down roots and thrive.

Good luck. 

I've never had a dream job, but I have had 2 completely different careers and been in multiple environments and places within those careers.  I can say that the perfect work environment does not exist, and neither does the perfect job. But there are things you can do to make your job nearly perfect for you. If possible work at a job you enjoy, in an environment that is comfortable, with people that you enjoy because that makes the 40 hours go by quicker. If that isn't possible, look for the positive where you are, and figure out if there are steps you can take to improve your current situation. If that fails, it may be time to look elsewhere. Make a list of pros and cons to your current situation. Figure out what matters most to you, is it paying off your debt, making big bucks or maybe something else entirely? Be pragmatic and realistic. And know that there are different concerns/pressures at every company and job that you take. As was mentioned above the grass may not be greener, so if you are seriously looking at a big change be prepared for the plusses and minuses that may be associated with that change and with what it will take to make that change.

Wow, pretty deep for a first time post.  Welcome to BT, by the way.

I could be totally wrong, but just dissecting what you wrote.  Do you hate the JOB, or the enormous and dysfunctional bureaucracy?  If it's the latter, can you change companies and do the same job?

I understand your work should feel like it's adding value to someone else.  No one like to work on something that no one cares about, but HOW important is that to you?  I spend a lot of time golfing or triathlon - no value to anyone but myself, and I keep doing it.  (granted, that's "recreation" vs employment).  What I'm asking, is do you get any personal satisfaction for doing it or do you do it so others value it?

As for your last statement?  Why is it not realistic?  People do it.  Maybe not as an athlete (professional), but you can become a coach, go to school and become a kinesiologist or some other form of physical trainer.  Open a tri shop?  It can be done, just requires additional sacrifice and work.  Even though I don't subscribe to the "anything is possible" mantra of many people, I DO think that a lot of people can achieve a lot more than they think if they are willing to go for it.

Personally?  I like what I do enough that I don't hate going to the office.  I don't think I'll EVER be the kind of guy that will jump out of bed excited to go to work no matter what it is.  I realized that if I can tolerate (which is probably not the right word and will get picked apart, but I also don't want to say "enjoy", which was my other option) my work enough to spend 8-9 hours a day at it, and get a decent salary?  It's not bad.  There have been jobs and just about went insane with how much I hated them and didn't want to go.

Just whatever you do... DON'T FORGET THE COVER SHEET ON YOUR TPS REPORTS!!!

Legit advice!

Seconded. Spent a big chunk of my life climbing the corporate ladder only to find that I was extremely unhappy when I got to the top tier. Figure out what makes you happy, and then figure out how to make a living doing that. You're young enough to have a couple failures, learn from them, and move on.

I just gave a talk to graduate students at a university who are just getting ready to enter the work force. Here's the bullets I used as talking points; some of them were taken from an excellent Forbes article.

•Think of your career as a series of experiences.

•Take risks early and often in your career.

•Don’t settle for a job you’re not passionate about.

•Spend more time with people than with your laptop.

•Figure out what makes you happy, never lose sight of that.

most of these bullets are obvious to me (although admittedly, they were not when i first finished college).  could you elaborate on "spend more time with people than with your laptop?"  thanks

Sure. I work in the sciences. Graduate students and young professors spend all their time heads-down working. One of the big transitions that people have trouble with when moving from academia to industry is learning how to work in teams, and how important it is to interact if you want to get ahead.

I can relate a little in that I now have the job that exactly fits my career choice and degree and it turns out I don't like it. I wasn't every really passionate about it, so I hesitate on the "dream job" designation, but It's what I wanted.  Now I feel like I wasted time, and also am pigeonholed - or so it seems based on my lack of success in finding other jobs.

The advice here that really hits home to me is:   The grass isn't always greener on the other side.

I kept searching and searching, trying other types of industries in my area, and hate all of the work settings available to me.  Now at least I have a job that suits my lifestyle and doesn't cause me trouble.  That's something.

   I've been thinking about this since my ex's attorney told me that my dream job didn't pay enough and I should find a different job!  I LOVE teaching and resent that I am being asked to give it up because it doesn't pay enough!