What did you learn from your test ride?

I don't want to believe that article.  

I want to believe that each bike has a unique feel, that I can discern, and would pay thousands more to enjoy and appreciate the subtle difference.

I'm not at all surprised that you (and many others) would feel that way.  In fact, it's a central point of the article that almost everyone does.  Perception is an interesting phenomenon.  However, I do strongly doubt that you would do any better than other experieinced riders in the types of blinded studies he described.  Others have done them with similar results.

Definitely a good read. My take-away from it, though it seems obvious, is that test rides aren't a good measure of how well a bike actually suits you.

I think that if you had two different bikes dialed in to your exact numbers with identical components, your saddle & pedals, that a relatively long ride over varied terrain (the same ride, though) might be telling. Most of the studies were done in much more controlled environments. Also, it's a really rare bike shop that would let you perform those kind of test rides. So your basic rough dial-in then a few laps around flat city blocks (or even up and down a few rollers in the vicinity) to see how it feels, that usually comprises 'test rides,' isn't very effective. Good to have his review and some metrics on that.