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2005-07-05 7:13 PM

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Lake Mary Florida
Subject: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Well I am posting this way off topic thing today because if I put it out there then it will get out of my head. My ex bf and I are good friends. Tonight we were supposed to swim at the pool at the same time. The pool was filled with kids so we decided to go for calimari instead. We were talking about my upcomming move and I was telling him I thought it would be good but hard for me as I have had a really hard time getting over him. We were walking back to our cars and I made a joke about my being pathetic because it was taking me such a long time to get past all of this. Anyway, he laughed and told me I was not pathetic. Then he went on to say that he was the pathetic one. Here he was 32 years old and he had never been in love with anyone. How pathetic was that? I know he did not realize he was telling me he never loved me. It just came out of his mouth. I just stopped walking. I just started to cry. He realized what he had done. He tried to apoligize but how do you take that back. I just got in my car and came home. I guess I should be really glad I am moving.


2005-07-05 7:35 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Resident Curmudgeon
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The Road Back
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Men are such jerks.
2005-07-05 7:39 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Champion
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Williamston, Michigan
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

What a jerk...aren;t you glad he is out of your life now!!!!  go to

http://www.greatboyfriends.com and sign up immediately

2005-07-05 8:11 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Elite
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Chicago
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

Men...who needs them.

2005-07-05 8:43 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Expert
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Livermore, Ca
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
That sucks. But thats the way guys are. We don't think before we talk. I tell all my girlfriends that at some point I'm going to say some dumbass sh!t, but I wont know it until it comes out of my mouth. They laugh at the time and then down the road I normally get slapped, atleast once.
2005-07-05 9:25 PM
in reply to: #190924

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COURT JESTER
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ROCKFORD, IL
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Men...can't live with'em...can't shoot em. I say SPANK'em


2005-07-06 6:30 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Queen BTich
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

You don't need him! Be very glad you're moving (I hope not because you're running away) and the new experiences you'll have very soon!

GOOD LUCK! You'll be fine.

2005-07-06 8:12 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Lake Mary Florida
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Thanks folks. I felt better just sending it out. Thanks for the support.

Don't worry about me running away Tri Comet. I am moving to Orlando. I have been trying for years to get a job down there. My family are in Florida. Besides I hate the winters here. Maybe I am running away from them! No more snow, No more snow. Woohoo!
2005-07-06 8:38 AM
in reply to: #191179

Pro
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Andover
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Bear is right... "Men are such jerks." And, your ex is a fine example!

As others have said, you don't need him!

Chin up and press on.

All the best,
Rob
2005-07-06 9:00 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Champion
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Ottawa, Ontario
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
That was a very serious "faux pas" by his part. Sometimes people, men and women alike, say things without fully weighing the implications of their words. If you are moving to Florida to escape your pesent dilemma, that is not good. You just escape your feelings; they will be with you wherever you go. I can assure you though, having been through this same thing myself many times, that what you feel at the moment will fade to relative obscurity in a very short time. If, on the other hand, you are going to Florida because you have a job wating there, you have family there and you hate winter, then that is a different story. I hope that you enjoy it!
2005-07-06 9:19 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Veteran
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Denver
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Soopergirl, I'm so sorry you had to hear that. I actually heard the same thing from my ex-husband. To me, it just reinforced why he is an "ex". I don't need that kind of crap in my life, and niether do you!





2005-07-06 9:30 AM
in reply to: #190924

Extreme Veteran
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Minneapolis, MN
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

I sense mixed messages.  Men are told to be completely honest, truthful and open.  Then, when they are... they're jerks???

At least you won't spend any time wondering what "might have been".

And yes, I'm sorry he hurt your feelings.  Nobody needs that.

2005-07-06 9:38 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Lake Mary Florida
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
I never said he was a jerk. We are friends. Honesty is a good thing. We dated for 18 months. He told me he loved me. Now he blurts out in casual conversation that he never did.

Anyway I agree with all of you that this is just a tool that I can use to move on. I hope the men in Florida are nice.

2005-07-06 9:47 AM
in reply to: #190924

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COURT JESTER
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Just got this one and thought it appropriate 



(Ladies_Kitchen_Accesory_1.jpg)



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Ladies_Kitchen_Accesory_1.jpg (34KB - 11 downloads)
2005-07-06 9:49 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Lake Mary Florida
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
That is funny! Just a little bitter, but funny!
2005-07-06 10:01 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Buttercup
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

That sucks. What a dumbass.

Welcome to FFFFFFFFFFFFLLLOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIDA! The men are no better but at least they are tanned!



2005-07-06 10:10 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Got Wahoo?
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San Antonio
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Sounds to me like you got lucky....
2005-07-06 3:02 PM
in reply to: #191268

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Giver
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Gatsby - 2005-07-06 9:30 AM

Men are told to be completely honest, truthful and open.  Then, when they are... they're jerks



I think her point was he lied for 18 months, but then told the truth. There's a time and a place for honesty, but that definitely wasn't it. It's like confessing an affair. You get the big burden off your chest, but then the other party has to deal with the aftermath. Not fair.
2005-07-06 3:15 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Buttercup
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Hey Soopergirl! Guess what I just found out?! My xBF - whom I agonized over for a year and a half after breaking up with him a third and final time - is MARRIED. Seems he was not so keen on the agonizing deal for himself. He went straight for wedding bells instead.
2005-07-06 10:29 PM
in reply to: #191275

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Extreme Veteran
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Western Massachusetts
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
soopergirl - 2005-07-06 10:38 AMI never said he was a jerk. We are friends. Honesty is a good thing. We dated for 18 months. He told me he loved me. Now he blurts out in casual conversation that he never did.


I think you've got to consider that he was lying this time, not back then.  Maybe he's so un-self-aware that he doesn't even REMEMBER that he used to be in love.  Or maybe he's so pathetic that he didn't realize he was in love.  Or maybe he's in denial because he blew it with a wonderful woman like you so he has to pretend he never loved you.

Gwendal
2005-07-07 7:35 AM
in reply to: #191993

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Buttercup
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Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)

Gwendal - 2005-07-06 10:29 PM Or maybe he's in denial because he blew it with a wonderful woman like you so he has to pretend he never loved you.

Gwendal

Denial. That's what it is. He doesn't want to admit to himself or Soopergirl that he screwed up.



Edited by Renee 2005-07-07 7:43 AM


2005-07-07 8:13 AM
in reply to: #190924

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Lake Mary Florida
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
You people really are super! I could not ask for a more supportive group. Thanks

Renee, MARRIED! Wow I guess he was not keen on the agonizing! We are really both better off!

2005-07-07 1:53 PM
in reply to: #191993

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Expert
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South Bend, IN
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
WOW....... I think I am going to run. What' s the skinny for tomorrow's episode, ladies?


;-)
2005-07-07 3:16 PM
in reply to: #190924

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Pro
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Helena, MT
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
Well, he's right, he is pathetic.
2005-07-07 4:19 PM
in reply to: #191201

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Master
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Ann Arbor, MI
Subject: RE: Reality Check (WAY OFF TOPIC)
I am sorry. Just proves you are better off without him!
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