Friday "Ha-ha"

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2007-08-31 7:54 AM

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Master
2379
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Alpharetta, GA
Subject: Friday "Ha-ha"

just the characters will make you laugh... 

Monkey Penguin Joke

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcklx07x9oI

2007-08-31 8:14 AM
in reply to: #948259

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COURT JESTER
12230
50005000200010010025
ROCKFORD, IL
Subject: RE: Friday "Ha-ha"
BAKED STUFFED CHICKEN

 


6-7 lb. baking chicken
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is good or make your own)
1 cup uncooked popcorn 

 Salt/pepper to taste


Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt,and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking
pan with the neck end toward the back of the oven.

 

Listen for the popping sounds.


When the chicken's a$$ blows the oven door open and the chicken flies across the room, it is done.


And you thought I couldn't cook

 

2007-08-31 8:18 AM
in reply to: #948259

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Champion
6786
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Two seat rocket plane
Subject: RE: Friday "Ha-ha"
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She
was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching,
so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys
applied for the job. One was a real "flamer" and the other an outright drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she
decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him
around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a
lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked hard and the ranch was
doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said "You have done a really good job,
and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels."
The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night.

He returned around 2:30am, and upon entering the room, he found the
rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting
for him. She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she
directed. "Now take off my boots."
He did as she asked, ever so slowly.
"Now take off my socks."
He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
"Now take off my skirt."
He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.
"Now take off my bra."
Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the
floor.

Then she looked at him and said: "If you ever wear my clothes into town
again, you're fired!"

 

2007-08-31 8:38 AM
in reply to: #948259

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Champion
15211
500050005000100100
Southern Chicago Suburbs, IL
Subject: RE: Friday "Ha-ha"

A Russian woman married a Canadian gentleman and they lived happily in Toronto. The poor lady was not very proficient in English but did manage to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries.

 

One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy chicken legs. She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, clucked like a chicken and lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. Her butcher got the message and gave her the chicken legs.

 

The next day she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say it, so she clucked like a chicken and unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breasts! The butcher understood again and gave her some chicken breasts.

 

The following day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. Unable to find a way to communicate this, she brought her husband to the store...

 

 

 

(Please scroll down)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What were you thinking? Hellooooooo, her husband speaks English! Get back to work ya perv!

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