My Dog is Dumber than Your Dog (Weirder, too)

Why, mmmrrrrrrrrrrrow there.

I'll take that as a yes. 

My Thomas.  First a description.  Father was Siamese and mother was part persian (all white and a farm cat).  So he had the same color scheme as Tom off of Tom & Jerry.  White belly and socks with grey back and darker grey tail.  And Baby Blue eyes.  Yep.  Baby Blue.  Unfortunately, they were just slightly cross eyed, but that's besides the point.

And he was big.  I mean REALLY big.  He was close to 2 ft' from nose to azz, not counting tail.  And at his heaviest he was 22 lbs.  Not fat, BIG!  Slept in the garage and spent all day long outside.  Came in the house 2 times a year.  His birthday (July) and Christmas.  Both to get his toys.  Then back out he went.

Anyway, he wasn't the smartest of cats.  Not stupid, just not real smart.  For instance, when he did make it into the house when he wasn't supposed to, he would go flying through the house to try to stay as long as he could.  We would chase him all over the place.  Well we had a sliding glass door leading out to the back yard.  You can already see where this is going.  Yep.  He would head straight for the door, leave the carpet, hit the parkay floor, realize about a foot or two from the glass that it was there, start the back pedal (which in and of itself is probably the funniest thing you can imagine seeing) and WHAMMO!!!!!!  Slam head first into it.  Thing is, he never really bounced off of it.  He would just sit there, head resting on the glass like "Stupid, stupid, stupid.  Every single time!"  That little scenario would happen at least 2-3 times a year.  He lived to be 13 and did it right up to the end!!!

My dog is a retard.  He actually responds to "butt head."  Not kidding, we got so used to calling him a butt head for his bones head moves, he actually responds to this name.

His big stupid pet trick is shoving his nose all the way into your shoes as soon as you remove them.  He shoved his head in and twists his head all around while inside the shoes. 

When I get home from work, he is my shadow - he sits in the doorway waiting for me to take my shoes off and put them in the closet. 

The real funny thing is that it seems to be a guilty pleasure for him because he will not do it if he knows you are looking at him.  So I have to literally turn away.  As this happens every night, I've done little experiments where I'll stand there watching him for a while, he'll just sit down next to the shoes until I'm not looking and when I finally do turn away, he's off to town.

He typically only does this to freshly worn shoes, but has occasion gone on binges where he'll sneak into the closet and been seen going up and down my rows of shoes doing this to each shoe.

On more than one occasion, he has gotten his puppy head stuck in the shoe and has stumbled out of the closet looking for someone to help him remove the shoe.

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My wife's dog, (who passed away in February), had a habit of barking at animals on TV.  She wouldn't just bark, but would charge the TV and lunge at the TV.  We had to purchase a higher TV stand because on several occasions, she pushed the TV off the back of the stand.

Summer 1998, the dog spent the summer with friends as we were in Atlanta (couldn't bring the dog with us).  We had forgot to tell them about this TV barking thing and one night she lunged at the TV, hitting a combination of buttons on the front of the TV.  She had somehow triggers the "For Sale Display Mode" on the TV, so while it played normal TV, it scrolled "For Sale" and "To Purchase this TV..." across the full screen.  Our friends got hung-up on when they called the customer service support line and we're asked the question : "please explain what happened to cause the TV to make this display."

Not so much dumb as pathetic.  My Nikki (who died last year), despite being the first animal to join the gearboy home, always assumed she was lowest on the totem pole.  So when the cats (who were the last to join) would eat from her food dish, she would just sit there and cry.  There's nothing more pathetic than a 90 pound golden retriever being bullied by a 16 pound cat!

Of course, the one cat had a real evil streak.  My daughter kept finding knives by her bedside.  It was getting a little creepy.  Till one day I caught her cat with a paring knife in it's mouth, taking it upstairs.  We learned to keep better track of loose knives.  But I still don't trust the cats!

Yesterday morning my catr did something so funny.  She was on top of my tall dresser and the top drawer was pulled out about 2 inches.   I keep my panties in this drawer.   She proceeded to stick her paw in and pull out every peice of underwear I own, letting them drop to the floor.   D and I just watched and laughed.

My previous dog used to eat anything.  he got into a salad bowl and ate everything except he spit out the chopped parsley

Hehehe... I'll play, too

My cat Annie can be kind of dump.  Once she was looking out of the full length window and saw a cat outside.  Outside cat started walking away.  Annie decided to follow by taking off at the same direction and ran into my bookcase.  Books fell on her.  Another time in the patio Annie wanted to chase a squirrel.  My cats are declawed (I got them that way) indoor cats, only that day for some reason they went out to the patio.  Of course she wasn't fast enough.  The squirrel jumped to the top of the fences about 6 ft tall. Annie stood up on her hind legs and looked at it with amazement.  And she would hissed at cats on the TV!

Littler Tiger, Annie's twin sister, is more curious.  Once she was taking a nap on the treadmill.  My ex-ex-bf turned the mill on at a very low pace.  Little Tiger, felt the belt moving backward, jumped off, only to return, sniffed and touched the slow-moving belt with her paw as to check out what was going on. 

Last year yesterday was the day Annie was put down.  She suffered from lymphoma.  She was 15.  Little Tiger is still doing great. 

Hahahaha!  Rossini's opera "The Theifing Magpie".  LOL

By looks of it, must be a boxer, i can relate i've got 2

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OMG soooooooooooo cute ... could totally be mine! With the inside-out ear, too.

My boxer Desmond was on a walk with my wife the other night (bright moonlit night) saw his shadow and proceeded to run from it. Jumped to one side then the other and darned if the evil shadow didn't follow. He will bark anytime he hears a doorbell, even if it is on TV.

And I'm not sure that this is weird, but it is funny as hell. When our chihuahua (who can't use the dog door) scratches to get in, Desmond will go stick his head out the dog door and look down at her like "duuuhhh, why are you still out here?" Then other times from outside he'll just stick his head in and try to figure out where my son is so they can play.

But I guess my question is How does your dog get on roofs? 

Ha ha ha ... that is hilarious.

My friend Kenneth sometimes takes her for sleepovers, and he has a ranch-style house, so there's a window out onto a flat roof. She hopped out the window, took off running, and ran out of roof ... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Kenneth said (after he found her and got over his heart attack) it was totally like a Tom and Jerry scene where Tom runs off a cliff and is frozen in slo-mo, looks around, then falls.

Oh and I forgot to add the fun and hilarity that ensued after the family and I got back home one night and found bunch of pink stains on the carpet, we looked around and found an empty 1lb bag of Valentine M&M's.  then we found a boxer with pink paws and a pink chest and a pink muzzle.  Apparently they may not melt in hands but they will melt on your paws if you lick them enough.

 He's fine now by the way, vet made him puke and we were good later.

I can relate to the doggie pathetic-ness.  My border collie (while very smart) consistently bows to the reign of our Alpha cat.  We have a special blanket for the dog to sleep on at night.  Sometimes the cat decides he wants to sleep there.  The dog will lay on the floor next to the blanket either whining or jusr resigning herself to sleeping on the floor.  The cat also attacks the dog on the yard.  Without warning he will dash out from under a bush and do a drive-by swatting of the dog's nose.

 My cat loves to sleep on his back with his legs spread wide.  He looks like an old, fat man veggin'out in front of the tv.

When we still had Murphy (and were watching the in-laws dog....Sophie), someone left the door open to the kids room and Sophie taught Murphy about the doggie joys of taking dirty diapers...yeah poopie ones also....out of the trash and eating them.  Such fun to pick up 'white diaper poop' for the next few days.

Too add a little smarts to this topic.  We think Murphy learned that if he licked his metal cage enough he could rust it and weaken it and destroy it when he would beat on it when he was locked up.  Some nights he would go into his cage and just sit there and lick the metal.  Of course, that could also exist on the dumb level also.

I have two Labrador Retrievers that are crazy.

Boomer, a chocolate male, can't swim.  Well, it's not that he CAN'T; he just doesn't know how.  When we first got him, he would not come near the water.  He would stand right at the edge and bark at me while I waded up to knee-depth.  Finally, he was just so pathetic that I coaxed him out on a dock and then threw him in.  He freaked out!  He tried to put his paws on top of the water and walk on it.  Now, he'll at least "wade" with me and when he does he sticks his face under the water and runs, blowing bubbles out his nose the whole time.  Still can't get him to come out past where he can touch the bottom.

I also remember the first time I tried to play fetch with him.  We were outside and I threw the ball thinking, "He's a retriever; he'll know what to do."  He just watched the ball bounce away and then looked up at me as if to say, "You better go pick that up before Momma sees what you did!"

Trinity, my black female, loves to do two things: fetch and swim.  That is, until she gets tired.  We know when she's tired because she'll bring the ball out of the water, go to a nearby tree or mound, "hide" the ball there, and then come back as if to say, "I don't know where the toy went, Poppa."

It's been a year since I've seen them; next week can't come soon enough.

Oh thanks! This one made my day!! My coworkers want to know what was so funny![

QUOTE]crowny2 - 2008-06-18 12:39 PM

I'll take that as a yes.

My Thomas. First a description. Father was Siamese and mother was part persian (all white and a farm cat). So he had the same color scheme as Tom off of Tom & Jerry. White belly and socks with grey back and darker grey tail. And Baby Blue eyes. Yep. Baby Blue. Unfortunately, they were just slightly cross eyed, but that's besides the point.

And he was big. I mean REALLY big. He was close to 2 ft' from nose to azz, not counting tail. And at his heaviest he was 22 lbs. Not fat, BIG! Slept in the garage and spent all day long outside. Came in the house 2 times a year. His birthday (July) and Christmas. Both to get his toys. Then back out he went.

Anyway, he wasn't the smartest of cats. Not stupid, just not real smart. For instance, when he did make it into the house when he wasn't supposed to, he would go flying through the house to try to stay as long as he could. We would chase him all over the place. Well we had a sliding glass door leading out to the back yard. You can already see where this is going. Yep. He would head straight for the door, leave the carpet, hit the parkay floor, realize about a foot or two from the glass that it was there, start the back pedal (which in and of itself is probably the funniest thing you can imagine seeing) and WHAMMO!!!!!! Slam head first into it. Thing is, he never really bounced off of it. He would just sit there, head resting on the glass like "Stupid, stupid, stupid. Every single time!" That little scenario would happen at least 2-3 times a year. He lived to be 13 and did it right up to the end!!!