Breast feeding is offensive? (Page 5)

when i was pregnant with ella, i thought i would only nurse to 12 months. anything longer than that seemed 'abnormal'. really, i was right = only 5% of breastfeeding moms are still nursing when their baby is 12 months old.

i nursed ella until she was 2 years old. when she finally weaned, she was ready to stop, but i wasn't. being a nursing mom was one of the first times in my life that i felt like i was doing exactly what i should be doing. it was one of the sweetest, most amazing things. it was hard at first, but was still a tender experience, and over time became a profound part of being a mother. fiona nursed even longer.

i also said that when a child was old enough to ask to nurse, obviously it was time to stop.

not only did my girls ask to nurse, they knew how to ask in two languages! both girls could sign 'milk' before they could say the word. fiona is still in the process of weaning, a bitter sweet transition to being a 'big girl', and will still ask 'please, nurse??'. nursing into toddlerhood was a challenge at times, but i wouldn't change it for the world.

i thought sleeping with the baby was wrong and 'family bed' was wierd.

we bought a crib, but it became a cloth diaper and baby clothing folding area. by the time we were pregnant with fi, we knew we had to just buy a king sized bed, since we knew both kids would probably be sleeping with us at some point in the night. ella now sleeps in her bunk most nights, and we're working on getting fi into her bunk too, but when the girls are sick, or scared, or don't want to be alone, they are with us in 'the biggest bed in the world' (after the fabulous kids book about family bed).

i thought having an $80 baby quilt and matching bumper was really important.

they never were used and ended up being handed down to my brother and law and his wife.

i'm still learning that i have to keep an open mind as a parent. we were going to homeschool, and even started, but now ella is in school (and loving it). i never thought i would nurse past 12 months, then i was 'extended' nursing and believed i would never have to wean a child, and now i'm weaning fi. i never thought i would have to use disposable diapers, but after cloth diapering for 5+ years, lately fi is in pull-ups all the time.

never say never. i never thought i would be a runner or a triathlete either. keeping an open mind and looking at all the possibilities might be hard, but it is SO worth it!

+ if the mom is working and not in a place that is supportive of her taking time out of her day to pump, and that puts her job at risk, especially if she is the primary bread winner, that is a con.

+ if a mom was sexually abused as a child (or as an adult), sometimes breastfeeding can cause painful memories to resurface, and cause moms to go into depression. sometimes this can be worked through, but sometimes it is just too painful.

+ if the mom is on medication that would be contraindicated for breastfeeding, that is a con. i have a friend with RA who was trying to conceive. had they been successful, she would have had to go back on her RA medications right away to curb the progression of the illness. it would not have been safe for her to breastfeed.

+ some children are allergic to breast milk (seriously).

of course, in general, the pros still outweigh the cons: http://medicalreporter.health.org/tmr0297/breastfeed0297.html

don't forget that breastmilk poop doesn't stink (well, at least not as bad as formula poop!).

mandy7741 - 2006-07-28 4:59 PM Is there a reason that a woman can't 'pump' before they go into public and bring it in bottles? That is what working mothers do for their babies when they can't be there because of work. The healthy effects are from the actual milk, it doesn't matter exactly how the milk gets from the breast to the baby....

Spend a little time with a breast pump and you'll know the answer. For me, at least, if I needed to pump enough to fill a bottle I had to plan several days in advance, freezing the milk in small increments. Pumping more than about 1.5 ounces at a time just didn't happen.

Plus, with breastfeeding you can carry the baby with one arm and still have the other free. Bottle feeding takes two hands.

To be quite honest, I've never seen a breastfeeding mother in public who was exposed...the baby covers up the nipple and the rest is just skin. Mostly breastfeeding mothers are wearing shirts that are pulled up, so perhaps a bit of rib skin shows...much less than at the beach.

I breastfed my first two children. In the ten years between my second and third children I had breast surgery that prevented me from nursing my third and fourth....and believe, me, I tried! If I had known I wouldn't be able to nurse again, I wouldn't have had the surgery. For me, breastfeeding had all the pros while bottle feeding had all of the cons.

Sorry, but for anyone who is offended by breastfeeding in public...try minding your own business.

Edited by Momida 2006-07-29 9:50 AM

thanks, celeste!

you are awesome, carrie. 5 kids - that is just fantastic. i had the same problem with pumping. i have so much respect for working moms who do it several times a day. it was so tough for me to pump during the short time i was back at work.

I have read all those posts to date and I have to jump in here. I have 3 children and have done both bottle formula and breastfeeding/pumping. With my oldest, I did not breast feed as my husband was leaving me alone 10 days after her delivery for a month - which btw was a c-section in a town where I knew noone. We were military at the time. In Kansas it's against the law to drive after c-section till your post-partum... rather you are not covered by insurance if you get in an accident. Something about all the blood lose. it's the same in NC.

I digress, my eldest had ear tubes placed 4 days before her brother arrived when she was 13 months. So I felt like it was my fault she had to have tubes since I did not breast feed - which is suppose to prevent ear infections. So I was hell bent on breastfeeding my son. Well, he loved it and so did I but I would have never breestfed in public. I just didn't have the comfort level to do that. So we bought a van and we enjoyed our nursing sessions listening to tapes and singing along. He weaned himself right around a 1yr old.

But low and behold, by the time he was 16 months, he had his first set of tubes. by my son's fourth yr we have had 6 set of ear tubes between them... so breastfeeding didn't protect my son's ears.

Both formula and nursing served out family's needs at the tim and has proo and cons... yes cons to breastfeeding. I was on duty ALLLLL the time. Hubby never lost any sleep. That's a con to me for breastfeeding.

Now, 5 years later I added another baby to our group. Isabel had difficulty nursing. We had help from consultants, nurses etc.... but still at 3 weeks of age she was no where near her birth weight. She wasn't peeing nor poopin - it was becoming a medical health issue. So I did supplement her. After about 1 week her birth weight was back and she was happy and healthy. And as a family it worked for us. Whether you nurse or formula feed the family has to do what works for them.

I could never feel comfortable with nursing in public - attempted once and was so uneasy with it I never did it again. It was just an emotional nightmare. Other mothers feel fine with it and they should be able to nurse their baby on demand whenever and wherever the baby needs nourishment. But also, mom's who formula feed should not have to explain their decisions why to formula feed. I agree that parents should be educated -prior to baby's arrival - about the pro and cons of each method but as long as baby is healthy, growing and happy who cares where the food comes from as long as baby is healthy. Our society is way to judgemental about other people's decisions.

I have to add this also. When we were in the military we got to shop at the commissary and PX... they sell food and goods at basically cost. The commissary under federal law can not make a profit so they have what is also called case lot sales... imagine getting a case of 12 toilet bowl cleaner for $1.50 total or a jar of large jar of peanut butter for $.25.... so formula was not marked up as much as other reatilers. I did the breakdown with my first daughter and the cost wasn't any more then what cow's milk cost per ounce - about $.10 per ounce. So it's not necessarily the maker marking up the formula but rather the retail chain who knows it's going to be bought and marks it up for their own profit margin.

Breastfeeding is a personal choice! As for those who thought the picture on the cover was over the top, wasn't that women who objected to her son seeing the picture from ultra-religious-conservative Texas? That probably has more to do with her opinion then of the actual act of breastfeeding - breast is equated with sex regardless of it's God given purpose. I think they forget God did give them to women to serve a purpose - to nourish our children.

ok, that's my 2cents

Cathleen





Edited by houston-tri-mamma 2006-07-29 10:29 AM

this is very true. the first time time i was away overnight from fiona was when she was 2 1/2. prior to that, i had only been away from ella overnight twice - once for a one night camping trip with bill just after we found out we were pregnant with fi, and again when i was in the hospital giving birth. while i'm glad i've been a breastfeeding mom for 5+ years, i am REALLY enjoying not having to be with fi at bed time every night. i can now look at being out late with my girlfriends (rare though that is), races out of town, diva days through rei, etc. even though i am still with her most of the time, i know i COULD go overnight if i needed to, and that knowledge alone is very liberating.



VERY true. i was very judgemental when i first had ella. we figured out a way of parenting that worked so well for us, i couldn't understand why everyone wasn't parenting the way we were...until i hurt the feelings of a dear friend. i was so PRO-breastfeeding, that i, and a few other people, made her feel guilty for not being able to breastfeed a child she hadn't even conceived yet. she ended up adopting a child who had been abandoned. her journey to motherhood was a lesson in how the key component of being a good parent is LOVE. unconditional love. biology, breast milk, cloth diapers - just so many details.

I'm not sure silicone is all that nutritious

Nicola