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 2013-10-30 12:23 PM in reply to: lifejustice |
Extreme Veteran  3025    Maryland |  Subject: RE: DNF handlingOriginally posted by lifejustice Originally posted by Dan-L I'm tempted to have a(nother) rant about the selfishness of breaststrokers but let's keep this about you.. Try and put yourself in the position of a friend of yours who this has happened to - what would you think? what would you tell him to do? You did the hard part - you've done the training and got yourself to the start line in shape. All you can take from this experience is that you're hard as nails and getting as far as you did with cracked bones takes guts and determination. That's something you can call on in the future when you think the race is a hard one. Now you have to go into a new training programme - the one that gets you to your first day of training again in eight weeks. Treat it like a race day and prepare for it in its own way. You've got a physical and mental challenge to cope with. You'll go through a process. You're upset now. You'll be angry soon. Then you'll have some other emotions and then you can start to rebuild. You can't train now, so what can you do - you can focus on nutrition. Find the next race you want to do. Cracked ribs heal well so you're "lucky" you've got an injury you will recover from simply and well. Find some positives. Good luck! I don't see it as a failure at all. Some M@$*f@#$KER kicked you in the ribs. Did that end your day? No way. you STILL SWAM 1.2 miles. Did you quit when you got out? No way. You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! Let that sink in for a minute. Serious. Keep that in your head. That is the way the rest of us see it. I know it probably feels like you have failed and all of that training went down the drain...but let's face it, you fought adversity up until the point that it consumed you. That is why we do these races. Honestly, you have a better story than most people that cross the finish line. That is my point of view. Take some time off. Grieve properly. feel bad about it. But once you make it through the grieving process get back into training and do the next one with vengeance.
This post should be a sticky. |
| 2013-10-30 1:06 PM in reply to: lifejustice |
Regular 287 Levittown, PA | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by lifejustice I don't see it as a failure at all. Some M@$*f@#$KER kicked you in the ribs. Did that end your day? No way. you STILL SWAM 1.2 miles. Did you quit when you got out? No way. You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! Let that sink in for a minute. Serious. Keep that in your head. That is the way the rest of us see it. I know it probably feels like you have failed and all of that training went down the drain...but let's face it, you fought adversity up until the point that it consumed you. That is why we do these races. Honestly, you have a better story than most people that cross the finish line. That is my point of view. Take some time off. Grieve properly. feel bad about it. But once you make it through the grieving process get back into training and do the next one with vengeance. Honestly, this is the best post I have read in a long time. You nailed it |
| 2013-10-30 2:03 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
| 59 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Wow. I'm blown away by the amazing level of support from all of you out there. I appreciate all of the advice I've gotten so far. Yeah, I probably do need to "grieve" a bit and get it out. I'm hoping once I realize that it's not the end of the world. Just because I did DNF, doesn't erase the gains I've made. I'm still an athlete (triathlete!) and my coach reminded me of the list I made of what I accomplished in the last 15 months... The DNF didn't erase that, and yeah it's not all that impressive compared to a lot of triathletes, but given where I started ... it's good. The doc will let me know today after a round of radiology what the recovery will be, but I already had the Disney World full marathon on my calendar for January, so I need to turn to that and focus on this. I do need to find a tri sooner and not wait until my plans around summer here. That may be a problem given the northern climes I live in, but given that I flew almost 3000 miles to compete in my first 70.3, I guess travel shouldn't be an issue. All of you rock and I thank you. I do feel a little better today just reading these posts. |
| 2013-10-30 2:28 PM in reply to: lifejustice |
| 59 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by lifejustice Originally posted by Dan-L I'm tempted to have a(nother) rant about the selfishness of breaststrokers but let's keep this about you.. Try and put yourself in the position of a friend of yours who this has happened to - what would you think? what would you tell him to do? You did the hard part - you've done the training and got yourself to the start line in shape. All you can take from this experience is that you're hard as nails and getting as far as you did with cracked bones takes guts and determination. That's something you can call on in the future when you think the race is a hard one. Now you have to go into a new training programme - the one that gets you to your first day of training again in eight weeks. Treat it like a race day and prepare for it in its own way. You've got a physical and mental challenge to cope with. You'll go through a process. You're upset now. You'll be angry soon. Then you'll have some other emotions and then you can start to rebuild. You can't train now, so what can you do - you can focus on nutrition. Find the next race you want to do. Cracked ribs heal well so you're "lucky" you've got an injury you will recover from simply and well. Find some positives. Good luck! I don't see it as a failure at all. Some M@$*f@#$KER kicked you in the ribs. Did that end your day? No way. you STILL SWAM 1.2 miles. Did you quit when you got out? No way. You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! Let that sink in for a minute. Serious. Keep that in your head. That is the way the rest of us see it. I know it probably feels like you have failed and all of that training went down the drain...but let's face it, you fought adversity up until the point that it consumed you. That is why we do these races. Honestly, you have a better story than most people that cross the finish line. That is my point of view. Take some time off. Grieve properly. feel bad about it. But once you make it through the grieving process get back into training and do the next one with vengeance. Wow. Just wow. I'm saving that one away. I hadn't looked at it that way, but you're right! Thank you! |
| 2013-10-30 2:47 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
| Subject: RE: DNF handling Others have it on it already, but I'll say it again myself. It's just a race. It does not erase all the hard work you put into training...unless you let it. It's okay to feel a little depressed about it. That's human nature. Finishing a race wouldn't bring so much joy if having a poor race didn't hurt so much. But again, don't let that overshadow the joy you should also be getting knowing that you are healthy and you get to wake up every morning and you have the choice to do such things. Some people don't even have that opportunity. They say that life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you deal with it. |
| 2013-10-30 2:54 PM in reply to: Jason N |
Member 2098 Simsbury, Connecticut | Subject: RE: DNF handling All great advice - but they forgot one point - MILK THE SYMPATHY FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY  Seriously, HOLY CRAP - you swam 1.2 miles with a FRESHLY BROKEN RIB!! You should make a t shirt that says that! "I swam 1.2 miles with a broken rib. What's your excuse?" |
| 2013-10-30 2:55 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Champion 7547  Albuquerque, New Mexico Bronze member | Subject: RE: DNF handling Your feelings are entirely valid. You spent a significant amount of time working towards a goal that you haven't achieved. This doesn't mean you're flawed, only that you are human (I've got goals I haven't accomplished as well). I talked to a friend of mine who DNF'd IMmoo (first IM attempt) and shared that finishers often suffer some of the same feelings (I could have done better....Now what??) so it isn't unique to DNF'ing. (I've DNS'd a couple races, it that hurts too.) Give yourself a few weeks to decompress. During this time, reflect on why you signed up for the race and what you wanted finishing it to signify. This isn't about what did or didn't happen, it's about what you *wanted* to happen and why. Once you have done that, you can look honestly at whether you did everything you could reasonably do to accomplish your goal. You can also look at whether you want to try again or not. If the feelings about DNF'ing the race start to interfere with other parts of your life (work, snapping at your family, etc.) get some additonal help. |
| 2013-10-30 5:31 PM in reply to: McFuzz |
Champion 5312 Calgary | Subject: RE: DNF handling You are not alone. I have had a bad DNF. It sticks with you. It doesn't matter what anyone says or does. You may never be able to forgive yourself for your mistake. The pain will dull but it will always be there. I trained for a race for a long time, the DNF was horrible. It was soul destroying. I was crushed beyond repair for weeks. I replayed the race in my head a million times. I rewrote my race report more than 5 times. Here is a link to my RR http://www.beginnertriathlete.com/discussion/forums/thread-view.asp... so you can see just how fragmented I was. For me, I found the cause of my DNF and trained to avoid it in the future. I also began to accept that what I had accomplished was something to be proud of. That the DNF was in a way inconsequential. It is trite, but assuming you were capable of finishing, the only difference between the DNF and not having the DNF is finishing. Also, bad news, I went back to that race I DNF'd and did well. It did not erase the pain. Also, a hard DNF makes you a better person. You were in the race to do well, you took a risk, it cost you. End of story. Some people may say if you don't DNF ever once in a while you aren't really racing. Also, as many have alluded to, you sir are my hero, get past the mistake, you are Bad A$$. |
| 2013-10-30 5:43 PM in reply to: BigDH |
Royal(PITA) 14270 West Chester, Ohio | Subject: RE: DNF handling It has been well said by many. Yes, it is extremely disappointing to take a DNF on a race. I have never had that, but yes I have had disappointing races and a few DNS because of injury. It takes a while to get over the race that you had planned in your mind and come to terms with the one that you were dealt. There is no right or wrong in feeling any particular emotion--and like McFuzz said (didn't you finish CdA with a broken collar bone McFuzz?) get help if it starts to interfere with your relationships. Take the time to heal--both the broken rib and your spirits. If you really want to get the 70.3 find another race and sign up when you are ready. You have my total respect for swimming 1.2 miles with a broken rib, that had to hurt like a beast. Riding the bike until you passed out? Yeah that was INSANE. Something tells me that you will heal up and find your way back….& have a fantastic race too! |
| 2013-10-31 6:35 AM in reply to: moverby20 |
| 77 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by moverby20 I had hoped my first post to this forum would have been about how I finished my first ever attempt at a 70.3 distance as part of my overall comeback, but instead I'm seeking help on how to handle a DNF at IM Miami 70.3 over the weekend (I just got home last night). Quick background on the DNF (and I apologize for rehashing it). During the in-water start, the guy next to me started out doing the breaststroke, and I was (in hindsight) a little too close and his kick went out and caught me full force on the right side of my ribs. I didn't think anything too much of it at the time other than chalking it up to, yep, that's triathlon for you. Also in hindsight, I should have known something was up when my pace was way lower (even accounting for the non-wetsuit) and that I was continually having to sight more to the right because I was pulling left something fierce. The swim is my strongest leg and I can normally do the 1.2mi in around 39 - 41 minutes. I had a 53 minute swim. I got out of the water, ran to T1 but it felt like my entire right side was cramping. I chalked it up to I needed some salt and I probably didn't have enough nutrition before the water since my wave left almost an hour after the start. Helped a guy in T1 with a flat (all I did was give him a spare CO2 and a tire lever (I still had 2 more in my tail bag)), and then got onto the road. My T1 was a little slow, but under my max that I had allotted. I got out on my bike and for the first 10 miles I was actually doing better than plan. I felt great and I was weaving the streets ok and was ahead of pace. Then when we got out into the headwinds, I focused on getting down in the aero position when it all started to go wrong. I ended up having to pop back up in 10 seconds because it felt like my side was on fire. I kept having to go up and down. I knew we had a headwind, so I chalked it up to working harder, adjusted my gears and kept pushing - but it kept getting worse. At the first aid station, I got my water did my nutrition, but pulled over by the porta's and just tried to stretch out because I thought it was a cramp. One of the medics actually pulled over and asked if I was ok, and I told him it was a cramp and I was fine. I remounted and kept going. At mile 22, I had to pull off because I just couldn't breathe without pain and I couldn't get down in aero at all. When I dismounted, I blacked out and fell into the median. The next thing there are 3 police officers and a fire truck next to me and the medics tell me that I have at least one broken rib and that my day is over. Ok, now to the question and the request for help... I am absolutely devastated. I have been training for this race since July of 2012. I have woken up every morning crying and I'm having a hard time especially now that I'm home facing the rest of my training partners and team mates. I feel like a failure and I'm questioning if I can do this or not. My coach keeps reminding me that I was trained and she had no doubt whatsoever that I would have finished. It was doubly hard to DNF because my coach was out there racing the same race and we travelled together (along with one of my other teammates). I just keep on with the second guessing and with the doubts and I'm just in such a funk I don't know what to do. I'm still doing IM AZ next year, but my confidence is not what it was (well, right now it's close to zero). My coach and friends keep reminding me of how far I've come since I started training, and I probably should be proud of that (I was coming off my 7th orthopedic surgery in 6 years, 2 pulmonary embolysims, and I've dropped 130 lbs since I started) - but right now all I can feel is failure. So I'm asking for advice or suggestions on what others may have done if they had a DNF. Help? Thanks... I DNF'd Ironman TX in 2011. I immediately signed for Ironman TX 2012. I DNF'd Ironman TX 2012. I am competing in Ironman AZ in two weeks. Get back on the horse. |
| 2013-10-31 6:54 AM in reply to: QueenZipp |
Champion 7547 Albuquerque, New Mexico Bronze member | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by QueenZipp It has been well said by many. Yes, it is extremely disappointing to take a DNF on a race. I have never had that, but yes I have had disappointing races and a few DNS because of injury. It takes a while to get over the race that you had planned in your mind and come to terms with the one that you were dealt. There is no right or wrong in feeling any particular emotion--and like McFuzz said (didn't you finish CdA with a broken collar bone McFuzz?) get help if it starts to interfere with your relationships. Take the time to heal--both the broken rib and your spirits. If you really want to get the 70.3 find another race and sign up when you are ready. You have my total respect for swimming 1.2 miles with a broken rib, that had to hurt like a beast. Riding the bike until you passed out? Yeah that was INSANE. Something tells me that you will heal up and find your way back….& have a fantastic race too! Yes, not one of my smarter decisions ever as it could have gone very badly, and at times, I worried about that. |
| 2013-10-31 7:02 AM in reply to: spiderjunior |
Member 54 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by spiderjunior Originally posted by lifejustice I don't see it as a failure at all. Some M@$*f@#$KER kicked you in the ribs. Did that end your day? No way. you STILL SWAM 1.2 miles. Did you quit when you got out? No way. You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! Let that sink in for a minute. Serious. Keep that in your head. That is the way the rest of us see it. I know it probably feels like you have failed and all of that training went down the drain...but let's face it, you fought adversity up until the point that it consumed you. That is why we do these races. Honestly, you have a better story than most people that cross the finish line. That is my point of view. Take some time off. Grieve properly. feel bad about it. But once you make it through the grieving process get back into training and do the next one with vengeance. Yes, this is the way I saw it as I was reading the OPs post. DUDE you did 22 miles on a bike with a broken rib!!! HOLY CRAP!!! |
| 2013-10-31 10:33 AM in reply to: moverby20 |
Champion 7036 Sarasota, FL | Subject: RE: DNF handling Unfortunately we live in an imperfect world and sometimes stuff happens outside of our control. The more races you do, the odds are that something is going to happen eventually, be it an injury, a flat tire, or whatever, that will mess up your day. I've also just had "bad" days when I just felt awful and was slow for now apparent reason. As other have already said, you learn from it an then move on. It's behind you; don't dwell on it. Mark |
| 2013-10-31 12:59 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Regular 311 Aalborg, Denmark | Subject: RE: DNF handling Man, you DNF because someone kicked you hard. I DNF a marathon because I ran like an idiot and near collapsed at 32km. Not finishing because of your own stupidity is worse than some outside factor you can't control. I do understand your frustration though. I hated, HATED, having to DNF. I didn't really get over it until my next marathon which I finished in good style. I suggest just doing another race and learn whatever you can from the experience. My horrible marathon made me a much better and smarter runner and I have become better at planning and executing races. Learn from your DNF and rock the next race. Also remember that shi!t happens. |
| 2013-10-31 1:38 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Master 3127 Sunny Southern Cal | Subject: RE: DNF handling Best advice I can give you is to forget about it and start focusing on the next race. I've DNS'd my last two HIMs now due to medical/health issues. Oh well, I'll just schedule another and train for it. I don't view it as a failure. Stuff happens, you just deal with it and move forward. |
| 2013-10-31 1:38 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Pro 6011 Camp Hill, Pennsylvania | Subject: RE: DNF handling There are two kinds of endurance athletes...Those who have experienced a DNF, and those who will in the future. This weekend you stopped being a member of the second group, and became a member of the first. You now have more experience to draw on as you continue on your journey in this sport. That's never a bad thing. It happens to everyone at some point if they race long enough. Most of the time it's due to mistakes made by the athlete that could have been avoided, and sometimes it's simple bad luck. You experienced some bad luck. It happens. Try to view it as part of the adventure and the overall experience. Honestly, your story about your experience is much more interesting than a race report that came off without a hitch. It takes some serious determination to swim 1.2 miles than bike until you pass out. I'm impressed! Now, go plan your next race.
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| 2013-11-01 12:32 PM in reply to: mtnbikerchk |
| 59 | Subject: RE: DNF handling One of my friends says that I need to wear that T-shirt to my HIM next year before IM AZ. Thanks for that. |
| 2013-11-01 12:35 PM in reply to: TriMyBest |
| 59 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Again, thanks to everyone who offered advice and comfort on the thread. I'm doing better now and the physical recovery is starting (I'm headed to the elliptical tonight to see how it goes). And yeah, I'm planning for a new race next year and I'm back to focusing on the Seattle Half and then the WDW marathon that were already on my calendar. |
| 2013-11-01 1:48 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Master 3205 ann arbor, michigan | Subject: RE: DNF handling Yeah. You are pretty much a pansy for not finishing that race. If it were me I would have sucked it up and finished, no matter how much it hurt. Wait........ If someone said that to me, those would be fighting words. Would you let someone talk to you like that about your race? I sure as heck wouldn't. If you would not let someone else talk to you like that, then why are YOU talking to yourself like that? Don't be harder on yourself that you would let others be. I would know, in my heart of hearts that I had only stopped because I could not go further. Once you can accept that you can move on. I echo others sentiments; you are a hard, hard man for finishing the swim and starting the bike with a broken rib. Heal up and get back at it. I hope this was somewhat helpful...... |
| 2013-11-01 3:20 PM in reply to: wannabefaster |
Regular 1161 Hamilton, IL | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by wannabefaster Yeah. You are pretty much a pansy for not finishing that race. If it were me I would have sucked it up and finished, no matter how much it hurt. Definitely my sentiments here. "You got on your bike like a Bada$$ and you rode until you passed the f&*k out! " That's pretty much spot on. Replace Wannabe's self criticism with this self-congratulations and you are in the right place. I know it's much easier said, than done, though. You show me an athlete that hasn't had post-race blues, and I'll show you an athlete than has never trained for an "A" race. My advice as a fellow athlete (though clearly not the bada$$ that you are) and as a Psychologist is to get back on the horse as soon as possible. That may mean different things, I do not know you. That may mean to sit on the recumbant in the Y with a totally jacked up rib and pedal for so long that you watch 6 episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond, or it may mean that when your rib heals you get back to SBR bricks and just kill it once or twice (taking a noob with you so you remember where you came from can really help). The point is that sooner is better than later, otherwise anxiety becomes an issue. Nothing strengthens feelings of anxiety more than the reinforcement from avoidance. Even though we might think that we aren't a failure because we didn't try it, we know that we are truly worried that we WILL fail, but I assure you that you will not, because failure is too broad and as athletes we have learned to find success in every workout. That's why we keep doing it. |
| 2013-11-01 5:23 PM in reply to: Danno77 |
| 59 | Subject: RE: DNF handling Originally posted by Danno77 You show me an athlete that hasn't had post-race blues, and I'll show you an athlete than has never trained for an "A" race. My advice as a fellow athlete (though clearly not the bada$$ that you are) and as a Psychologist is to get back on the horse as soon as possible. That may mean different things, I do not know you. That may mean to sit on the recumbant in the Y with a totally jacked up rib and pedal for so long that you watch 6 episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond, or it may mean that when your rib heals you get back to SBR bricks and just kill it once or twice (taking a noob with you so you remember where you came from can really help). Not to turn this into my therapy thread, but I'm sort of saddling up the horse and I'm going to go get on the elliptical tonight. I've got enough KT tape on there to keep them in business for a year. I'm running the Seattle Half Marathon one month from today. It may not be a tri, but it'll be my first half, so I'll get that last leg in yet.  |
| 2013-11-01 7:19 PM in reply to: ChrisM |
Master 3888 Overland Park, KS | Subject: RE: DNF handling You swam 1.2 miles and rode 22 with a broken rib. You're a bada$$ in my book. O.K. a DNF but you didn't give up. |
| 2013-11-01 8:23 PM in reply to: moverby20 |
Veteran 327 Plaquemine, Louisiana | Subject: RE: DNF handling I DNF'd recently at a race for the exact same reason you, I was kicked by a breaststroker (no broken ribs though) so I understand how you feel. You are amazing and have to be an incredibly strong swimmer and person period to be able to finish that swim at all with fractured ribs. The average person would have chucked up the deuces and exited the water with a quickness. Grieve and move on to the next race. Every athlete has a bad race, game, play etc. Be grateful you are able to do what you do. |
| 2013-11-02 8:42 AM in reply to: DigitalRain |
Regular 287 Levittown, PA | Subject: RE: DNF handling The more I think about this, the more I am impressed with your toughness. My dad broke a rib a couple years ago and I remember watching him struggle just to stand up and get off the sofa. It was a whole routine just for him to roll out of bed and onto his feet in the morning and not feel terrible pain. You swam 1.2 miles using your arms, your back, your core, pulling hard in the water !!!!!! Not to mention getting on your bike next and putting in work there too. You are tough as nails my friend. |
| 2013-11-02 9:00 AM in reply to: ChrisM |
New user 77 | Subject: RE: DNF handling You have to look for the positive in it. Two years ago I DNF'd 400 meters into an Olympic race because my wetsuit was too tight around the chest and I couldn't breath. I learned one very valuable lessons that day: Never try anything new on race day! That moment of being pulled out of the water on a boat in front of thousands of spectators was very embarrassing, not to mention all of the time and preparation that I had put into it. Then there was the embarrassment of having to tell friends and co-workers when they asked ' how'd it go' and the fact that took my family 100's of miles and wasted weekend for 6 minutes of stupidity. I honestly think that humbling experience made me more disciplined and made me take preparation and execution on race day more seriously. I won't ever forget about it but I can now laugh about it and it has made me a better athlete. I did two 70.3's this past year and I can't but sure, but, I don't think I would have been as successful without my DNF the year before. |
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