ODogg's tip of the Day

Thats almost as bad as:

Significant other "I'm getting fat!"

Dumb ass "Well, do something about it..."

Here are two questions that will pacify just about any stressed out wife.  Take notes boys, these are pearls of wisdom I'm handing out!

1. Would you like to talk about it? -- Women often relieve stress by talking about problems. *Disclaimer -- if she talks about her problem, DO NOT try to offer advice unless she asks.  The proper response is to agree with her that it sucks and you would feel the same way.

2. Can I help you with anything?  -- It could be that she just needs some help around the house.  She may ask you to unload the dishwasher, start dinner or do something else.  Just being willing to help and take some of her burdens will impress her tremendously.

Good luck guys!

Dude, you must have a death wish!

Correct answers include "Of course not, sweetie, have some more cheesecake," or alternatively, "Can we eat at McDonalds again tonight?"

The problem is in that men seem to think one manual will cover all women. Nope, each woman has her own.

Nope, each woman has her own.

And each of these individual manuals is under constant revision.

Of course. Like any good textbook, there needs to be a new edition every once in a while.

Yes, but what language are they written in?????

They are not written, Cavu. You must ascertain them through compassion, cunning and LISTENING.

That is your lesson for today, Grasshoppah.

And now are you surprised to hear that I am single???  When is the next lesson?  I must caveat that with saying that Odogg is my hero for that comment!

Patience, Grasshoppah. And don't listen to ODogg, THAT will most certainly keep you single. ;-)

Of course. Like any good textbook, there needs to be a new edition every once in a while.

Understandable, but do we really need four complete revisions every 24 hours?

YES!!!! :-)

Oh, and another not-to-do: "Honey, just so you're prepared, I feel a pretty nasty bout of PMS coming on."

"Well, can you just keep it to yourself this time?"

Not only stupid, but very, very dangerous.

Cavu9 - The secret is how you set expectations.  If the first time you notice she is getting stressed out you do something crazy like buy her a hot stone massage she's going to expect at least that the next time.  You don't ever want to be in a position where you always have to work to top yourself - birthday presents, anniversaries, doing daily chores - whatever.  If you take the thinking man's approach to what to do the first time you notice she's stressed, you'd tell her "Oh, get over it."  Now the bar is set so low anyone can keep improving.

You need to think ahead and plan.  Mess up at first and you're sunk.

*KICK!*

...which leads to stress relief. Makes sense, no? Of course, my wife has accused me of considering breathing to be foreplay.

Tip of the Day: pre-emptive flowers every 6 to 8 weeks. It's important to bank some goodwill for those times when you say something like "oh get over it".