Triathlon Dating Thread Ver 3.0 (Page 3)

Flood gates may now open lol

Welcome!

Good luck with your 2-3 dates!

My weekend was pretty low key.  I saw kickball girl some, but I started catching a cold, so we didn't do a whole lot.  It was nice getting to spend time with the sober version of her though.  We did talk about the drinking, and I think she understands where I'm coming from.  I'll have to see how this Thursday goes.

LOL I had to reread your post.  I was wondering what the heck was up with those men from Indiana.

My date Friday night was kinda "meh." I wasn't bored the entire time, but there was really no spark to speak of. Trying very hard not to be judgemental but a 36-year-old living at home raises my eyebrows.

I cancelled my Saturday date as I had major digestive issues all day but made it clear I wasn't blowing him off and was looking forward to seeing him sometime this week.

Blah.

Guys in there mid 30's who live at home are losers! Dump them right away.

I didn't say he was a loser, I said it raised my eyebrows.
I would be surprised if it DIDN'T raise someone's eyebrows. It's very unusual. 

Or as Jeff from Grandma's boy would say "My roomates"

I've had a woman, for lack of better phrasing, look down on me in a date for living in an apartment and not having a house.  Am I wrong for thinking that was a bit much?

edit: To elaborate, the conversation went like this:

her: "Where do you stay?"

me: "over at" and say the name of the complex

her: "oh...well why don't you have a house?" (in kind of an almost interrogative tone)

The irony of the conversation was that she was living with her parents at the time at the age of 30.  Granted she had her reason for it, but cut the guy living on his own some slack maybe?  I did just move here in September (which she knew this).

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 5:19 PM

msteiner - 2013-04-22 2:07 PM

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 3:29 PM

mr2tony - 2013-04-22 1:08 PM

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 3:02 PM

mr2tony - 2013-04-22 12:45 PM

Big Appa - 2013-04-22 2:28 PM

lisac957 - 2013-04-22 12:21 PM

My date Friday night was kinda "meh." I wasn't bored the entire time, but there was really no spark to speak of. Trying very hard not to be judgemental but a 36-year-old living at home raises my eyebrows.

I cancelled my Saturday date as I had major digestive issues all day but made it clear I wasn't blowing him off and was looking forward to seeing him sometime this week.

Blah.

Guys in there mid 30's who live at home are losers! Dump them right away.

Fixt. And it's funny cuz it's true.

What did you fix?  Their to there?  Hmmm?

Don't talk to me. I'm not single.

Okay.  I won't.  Pfffttt.

Regarding the living at home .. there are many reasons one might be in that situation. Doesn't mean they are a loser .. and sometimes it does.  It would raise an eyebrow and be a deal breaker.  Independence and the ability to take care of yourself and your own and handle your business are very important to me in a potential partner.  Just doesn't jive with my lifestyle, goals, etc and it would be a big red flag for me. 

I've had a woman, for lack of better phrasing, look down on me in a date for living in an apartment and not having a house.  Am I wrong for thinking that was a bit much?

edit: To elaborate, the conversation went like this:

her: "Where do you stay?"

me: "over at" and say the name of the complex

her: "oh...well why don't you have a house?" (in kind of an almost interrogative tone)

The irony of the conversation was that she was living with her parents at the time at the age of 30.  Granted she had her reason for it, but cut the guy living on his own some slack maybe?  I did just move here in September (which she knew this).

That's getting really picky. Especially for your age and all. Now at my age ...yeah ...I'd expect a guy my age to have a bit more to his name at this stage in life. Be in the same place emotionally as I am and have his financial life in order.

Wait, wait..  Living in an apartment isn't cool?

Also, I have the futon as the couch because it's comfy and is great for overnight guests...  Have a really nice bed.

Could probably have a bigger place, but really like living super-close to the lake and in a Doorman building..  Though, I sometimes wish I had a one-bedroom..  In a one-bedroom someone can ask "Hey, where are you"...."Hey, I'm in here!"  Can't be "In here" in my apartment...  I'd get a table to eat at if the bike trainer didn't take up the area it would go.  TV trays do fine.  Housekeeper comes monthly and keeps the place sparkling-clean, so it's never too messy...

Uhh..  I prefer to save and spend money on experiences vs stuff...

Oh geez...  So many things in my life just became clear.  

To be honest, I used to have furniture.  Stuff that wasn't from Ikea..  Coffee table with glass and real wood...  Nice couch..  Matching bedroom set..  Took a temporary work assignment in Miami about 6 years ago and left most everything in Philly (Girlfriend was doing a project abroad for 6 months, so it worked out well).  She came back and just before I was going to move back to Philly, we broke up.  So I just kind of left my furniture up there and started over in Miami.  Had a little room-for-rent for about 3.5 years.  Was fine since I traveled 45 weeks a year and was never home.  Then the travel stopped and I just never really got nicer stuff.  Crapo, I just realized I'm 34 and live like I'm in college.... 

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 6:13 PM

julio26pt2 - 2013-04-22 3:38 PM

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 5:19 PM

msteiner - 2013-04-22 2:07 PM

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 3:29 PM

mr2tony - 2013-04-22 1:08 PM

Teejaay - 2013-04-22 3:02 PM

mr2tony - 2013-04-22 12:45 PM

Big Appa - 2013-04-22 2:28 PM

lisac957 - 2013-04-22 12:21 PM

My date Friday night was kinda "meh." I wasn't bored the entire time, but there was really no spark to speak of. Trying very hard not to be judgemental but a 36-year-old living at home raises my eyebrows.

I cancelled my Saturday date as I had major digestive issues all day but made it clear I wasn't blowing him off and was looking forward to seeing him sometime this week.

Blah.

Guys in there mid 30's who live at home are losers! Dump them right away.

Fixt. And it's funny cuz it's true.

What did you fix?  Their to there?  Hmmm?

Don't talk to me. I'm not single.

Okay.  I won't.  Pfffttt.

Regarding the living at home .. there are many reasons one might be in that situation. Doesn't mean they are a loser .. and sometimes it does.  It would raise an eyebrow and be a deal breaker.  Independence and the ability to take care of yourself and your own and handle your business are very important to me in a potential partner.  Just doesn't jive with my lifestyle, goals, etc and it would be a big red flag for me. 

I've had a woman, for lack of better phrasing, look down on me in a date for living in an apartment and not having a house.  Am I wrong for thinking that was a bit much?

edit: To elaborate, the conversation went like this:

her: "Where do you stay?"

me: "over at" and say the name of the complex

her: "oh...well why don't you have a house?" (in kind of an almost interrogative tone)

The irony of the conversation was that she was living with her parents at the time at the age of 30.  Granted she had her reason for it, but cut the guy living on his own some slack maybe?  I did just move here in September (which she knew this).

That's getting really picky. Especially for your age and all. Now at my age ...yeah ...I'd expect a guy my age to have a bit more to his name at this stage in life. Be in the same place emotionally as I am and have his financial life in order.

 

Wait, wait..  Living in an apartment isn't cool?

Also, I have the futon as the couch because it's comfy and is great for overnight guests...  Have a really nice bed.

Could probably have a bigger place, but really like living super-close to the lake and in a Doorman building..  Though, I sometimes wish I had a one-bedroom..  In a one-bedroom someone can ask "Hey, where are you"...."Hey, I'm in here!"  Can't be "In here" in my apartment...  I'd get a table to eat at if the bike trainer didn't take up the area it would go.  TV trays do fine.  Housekeeper comes monthly and keeps the place sparkling-clean, so it's never too messy...

Uhh..  I prefer to save and spend money on experiences vs stuff...

Oh geez...  So many things in my life just became clear.  

To be honest, I used to have furniture.  Stuff that wasn't from Ikea..  Coffee table with glass and real wood...  Nice couch..  Matching bedroom set..  Took a temporary work assignment in Miami about 6 years ago and left most everything in Philly (Girlfriend was doing a project abroad for 6 months, so it worked out well).  She came back and just before I was going to move back to Philly, we broke up.  So I just kind of left my furniture up there and started over in Miami.  Had a little room-for-rent for about 3.5 years.  Was fine since I traveled 45 weeks a year and was never home.  Then the travel stopped and I just never really got nicer stuff.  Crapo, I just realized I'm 34 and live like I'm in college.... 

You had me a real wood coffee table!!! . Nothing wrong with an apartment. Or a futon. I don't care about material stuff. Or how nice something is someone has. But I do care about financial responsibility and the ability to support yourself and live within your means. So romantic. I know. I outright own my house my 2005 car, I have saved for retirement, funded my childs college fund and have investments and i have ZERO debt. I am frugal as heck and hate spending money on crap that doesn't matter. My bike is a 2004 ....it works just fine! I have a child to take care of and I don't want to be someone's sugar mommy, or bail them out of debt, or take on their debt or support them. I want them to be self sustaining as well. Not an unreasonable expectation to have of a 50ish year old dude. You at 34 are living just like I would have at that age!

You made my day!  Save a lot of what I make, no debt, paid off car, good retirement so far, could probably last a few years at this point if I lost my job and none were to be had...  Yet, my little brother calls my apartment his "favorite dorm room."  That stings a little bit.  But in the big scheme of things, I'd rather live humble and be secure than extravagant and fearful of losing income...  Was in debt once.  Sucked.  Never going back to that dark place...

My crossfit chick lives at her mom's house but has a good excuse.  It did raise an eyebrow, though.  She moved back from Florida to help take care of her mom.  I've met her mom - she isn't bedridden or anything but needs someone to help her track meds and stuff. 

That is still going well, btw.  We're still always happy to see eachother and going on a rock climbing trip with some of my friends in 2 weekends.  And planning a long weekend as far out as 2 months from now (Northern MI where she's running a Half Mary).  We've only been dating for about 2 months, and I guess I'm a little wary about how quickly things have progressed but whatcha gonna do?

I don't care if someone chooses to live in a house or an APT and think that's being too fussy.  Personally, I own a house but wish for the simplicity of renting.  Although I'd still prefer it were a house over an apartment, but that's just my liking a bit more space between me and my neighbors.  I'd like to be more portable so if some opportunity arose to relocate or take a year off work or to travel or whatever, that it'd be easier.  Experiences over things.

And also -
Why/how are men in their 30s still so immature??

The most recent guy I had been dating (but cut it off because he lied and skipped town, see a few pages back) texts me and asks if I want to come over last night. I say no, I won't be able to. He responds with "please delete my number from your phone".

LOL ok!

Not that it matters but 'blowing someone off' means something completely different in the UK.

If you ever tell your friends in England you blew off a date they're going to think you really liked him.

This is valuable information! 

At least he's not giving you mixed signals

In your shoes, my snap response would've been: "um... I already deleted it after you lied to me, genius"

Probably not worth the drama though...