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My wife is going to kill me
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 2014-12-10 10:19 AM |
 Richland, Washington |  Subject: My wife is going to kill meHello all, It's been fun here at BT. I only have a few days left to live... see, I got a call from my LBS..... Apparently they managed to get the 2015 Cervelo P5 six in a 54... it's enroute, expected to be in around christmas. Without any form of hesitation or thought, I pulled the trigger. That new paint is quite attractive.. and since IMCA did a number on my old P5.... it was either get that one painted, or buy a new one... So, with my final few days of life, I would like to say thank you to the BT crew for keeping me entertained. Unless one of you can come up with SOMETHING for me to get my wife that will keep her from killing me.... I'm pretty much a dead man. |
| 2014-12-10 10:24 AM in reply to: Swimaway |
Pro  15655    | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Get her a horse.......seriously. She'll be so busy buying saddles, boots, ropes, and all kinds of other horse crap it'll never occur to her that you are slowly going broke between what you spend and what she will start spending. Don't ask me how I know this...... |
| 2014-12-10 10:25 AM in reply to: Left Brain |
| Richland, Washington | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Left Brain Get her a horse.......seriously. She'll be so busy buying saddles, boots, ropes, and all kinds of other horse crap it'll never occur to her that you are slowly going broke between what you spend and what she will start spending. Don't ask me how I know this...... We do have a riding facility nearby... |
| 2014-12-10 10:38 AM in reply to: Swimaway |
1300 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Just keep denying it or any knowledge of a new bike. Even when she points right to it and says "it's new"...... deny it. I have no recollection of that senator. |
| 2014-12-10 10:42 AM in reply to: Swimaway |
Pro 15655 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Swimaway Originally posted by Left Brain We do have a riding facility nearby... Get her a horse.......seriously. She'll be so busy buying saddles, boots, ropes, and all kinds of other horse crap it'll never occur to her that you are slowly going broke between what you spend and what she will start spending. Don't ask me how I know this...... You're missing the boat. Hell, mine went so crazy she bought another horse for one of our daughters, then a trailer, then moved to another facility that was more expensive but they could ride indoor more......then thay started traveling to horse shows, and competitions.........she's so wrapped up with it, and probably hiding more gear than I am, that I never hear a word about whatever I buy for triathlon for me or the other kids. Plus......if the economy crashes you can eat the horses. It's a win all the way around. |
| 2014-12-10 10:56 AM in reply to: Goggles Pizzano |
Veteran 1900 Southampton, Ontario | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Goggles Pizzano Just keep denying it or any knowledge of a new bike. Even when she points right to it and says "it's new"...... deny it. I have no recollection of that senator. this makes the most sense. The best thing to do is dispose of the old one. I would be willing to pay for postage and I will ensure the offending, ruined old P5 is "taken care of" |
| 2014-12-10 11:07 AM in reply to: DaveL |
Member 1748 Exton, PA | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by DaveL Originally posted by Goggles Pizzano Just keep denying it or any knowledge of a new bike. Even when she points right to it and says "it's new"...... deny it. I have no recollection of that senator. this makes the most sense. The best thing to do is dispose of the old one. I would be willing to pay for postage and I will ensure the offending, ruined old P5 is "taken care of" Get rid of the old bike fast, and claim that the new bike is the same one you have been using for years. Another option is to photoshop the new bike into old pictures! |
| 2014-12-10 11:20 AM in reply to: mike761 |
| Richland, Washington | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by mike761 Originally posted by DaveL Originally posted by Goggles Pizzano Just keep denying it or any knowledge of a new bike. Even when she points right to it and says "it's new"...... deny it. I have no recollection of that senator. this makes the most sense. The best thing to do is dispose of the old one. I would be willing to pay for postage and I will ensure the offending, ruined old P5 is "taken care of" Get rid of the old bike fast, and claim that the new bike is the same one you have been using for years. Another option is to photoshop the new bike into old pictures! You guys are good! I thought about telling her I sent the old one out for "paint" |
| 2014-12-10 11:21 AM in reply to: Swimaway |
| Richland, Washington | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me I think I'm going to go for a ride.... might stop at a car dealership on the way home. |
| 2014-12-10 11:27 AM in reply to: Swimaway |
Expert 1051 Bradenton, Florida | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me No advise, but I'm calling dibs on the new bike once you're dead. |
| 2014-12-10 11:29 AM in reply to: #5073608 |
| 261 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me I regularly powdercoat a teammates' frame matte black so his new bike looks exactly like the old bio to his wife's untrained eye. |
| 2014-12-10 11:45 AM in reply to: Toefuzz |
| 240 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Toefuzz I regularly powdercoat a teammates' frame matte black so his new bike looks exactly like the old bio to his wife's untrained eye. This. I always try to keep my bikes the same color to avoid detection of new bikes. The bigger problem are online purchases that show up at my door while she is home. |
| 2014-12-10 12:18 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
Member 1748 Exton, PA | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Swimaway Originally posted by mike761 Originally posted by DaveL Originally posted by Goggles Pizzano Just keep denying it or any knowledge of a new bike. Even when she points right to it and says "it's new"...... deny it. I have no recollection of that senator. this makes the most sense. The best thing to do is dispose of the old one. I would be willing to pay for postage and I will ensure the offending, ruined old P5 is "taken care of" Get rid of the old bike fast, and claim that the new bike is the same one you have been using for years. Another option is to photoshop the new bike into old pictures! You guys are good! I thought about telling her I sent the old one out for "paint" You may not want to follow my advice. I'm divorced!!!!  |
| 2014-12-10 12:27 PM in reply to: StevenC |
| 788 Across the river from Memphis, Tennessee | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by StevenC Originally posted by Toefuzz I regularly powdercoat a teammates' frame matte black so his new bike looks exactly like the old bio to his wife's untrained eye. This. I always try to keep my bikes the same color to avoid detection of new bikes. The bigger problem are online purchases that show up at my door while she is home. I agree. I, however, send any and all of my online purchases to work so that 1) they're not found by the wife (especially gifts for her), and 2) they don't grow legs on my front porch. |
| 2014-12-10 1:09 PM in reply to: #5073646 |
Member 256 Iowa City, Iowa | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me I always love these kinds of posts lol I do like the approach of keeping a similar bike/color! :D |
| 2014-12-10 1:28 PM in reply to: Left Brain |
Veteran 345 Chesapeake, VA | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Left Brain Originally posted by Swimaway Originally posted by Left Brain We do have a riding facility nearby... Get her a horse.......seriously. She'll be so busy buying saddles, boots, ropes, and all kinds of other horse crap it'll never occur to her that you are slowly going broke between what you spend and what she will start spending. Don't ask me how I know this...... You're missing the boat. Hell, mine went so crazy she bought another horse for one of our daughters, then a trailer, then moved to another facility that was more expensive but they could ride indoor more......then thay started traveling to horse shows, and competitions.........she's so wrapped up with it, and probably hiding more gear than I am, that I never hear a word about whatever I buy for triathlon for me or the other kids. Plus......if the economy crashes you can eat the horses. It's a win all the way around. Just spit water out all over my keyboard... well played. |
| 2014-12-10 1:42 PM in reply to: StevenC |
| 1300 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by StevenC Originally posted by Toefuzz I regularly powdercoat a teammates' frame matte black so his new bike looks exactly like the old bio to his wife's untrained eye. This. I always try to keep my bikes the same color to avoid detection of new bikes. The bigger problem are online purchases that show up at my door while she is home.
Those are great ideas for the long con! |
| 2014-12-10 1:49 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
Master 2621 Mechanicsburg, PA | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Quick put me in your will. I will take care of that P5 for you. I can make a 54 work......... |
| 2014-12-10 1:56 PM in reply to: #5073680 |
| 225 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Inmade the mistakenof getting mynother half into cycling. I dont yhink any ofbthese tricks would work for us. |
| 2014-12-10 2:11 PM in reply to: bigevilgrape |
| Richland, Washington | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Update: bike shop just called. Apparently they cannot sell me the bike. I asked over and over again why not. The guy finally says "it's sold." To which I got a bit upset. He did his best to avoid the subject. Finally I flat out asked who bought it. He said. "I'm not allowed to tell you.... I was specifically told not to tell you. SHE was very adamant not to do so." On that note. I'm pretty sure my wife just bought me that bike. This changes things. Now I have to find skmething equally as awesome to get her. HELP! I'm on a ride.... Might be swinging by the dealership to look for a car for her... |
| 2014-12-10 2:13 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
Master 4118 Toronto Bronze member | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Swimaway Update: bike shop just called. Apparently they cannot sell me the bike. I asked over and over again why not. The guy finally says "it's sold." To which I got a bit upset. He did his best to avoid the subject. Finally I flat out asked who bought it. He said. "I'm not allowed to tell you.... I was specifically told not to tell you. SHE was very adamant not to do so." On that note. I'm pretty sure my wife just bought me that bike. This changes things. Now I have to find skmething equally as awesome to get her. HELP! I'm on a ride.... Might be swinging by the dealership to look for a car for her... Whoa, awesome wife!! Better find something and quick! |
| 2014-12-10 2:13 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
| Richland, Washington | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Left brain - how does one buy a horse??? Do I just call stables? What types of horses should I be looking at? Wife likes horses... Never thought about getting her one before. |
| 2014-12-10 2:27 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
Extreme Veteran 3025 Maryland | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me |
| 2014-12-10 2:33 PM in reply to: Swimaway |
Pro 15655 | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Swimaway Left brain - how does one buy a horse??? Do I just call stables? What types of horses should I be looking at? Wife likes horses... Never thought about getting her one before.
The first thing I did was buy my wife a package of riding lessons for her b-day one year.......she fell for it hook, lilne, and sinker. To this day she thinks it was the best thing I have ever done for her and is a measure of how much I care about her and understand her. I just bathed in the light of my goodness and counted the days until her lessons were over and she wanted a horse of her own. Of course, when the time came, I surprised her again with my overwhelming generosity and love for her by buying her a horse. Really, that was about the last time I had to have a conversation with her about anything. I hardly even see her. I don't have anyone to explain anything to.....and she's sometimes gone long enough that if she sees something new around the house I can tell that she's really not sure if it was there the last time she was home or not. For my part, I have faked a horrifying fear of horses since the first day she invited me "up to the stable". I made up a story about being kicked by a horse when I was a kid. I told her that for her I would try again to see if I could overcome it......and you can bet your arse I put on a brave front....but it was not to be. The fear is overwhelming. It's even worse than my cat alllergy. All in all, horses have improved the quality of my life. |
| 2014-12-10 2:42 PM in reply to: Left Brain |
Extreme Veteran 3025 Maryland | Subject: RE: My wife is going to kill me Originally posted by Left Brain Originally posted by Swimaway Left brain - how does one buy a horse??? Do I just call stables? What types of horses should I be looking at? Wife likes horses... Never thought about getting her one before.
The first thing I did was buy my wife a package of riding lessons for her b-day one year.......she fell for it hook, lilne, and sinker. To this day she thinks it was the best thing I have ever done for her and is a measure of how much I care about her and understand her. I just bathed in the light of my goodness and counted the days until her lessons were over and she wanted a horse of her own. Of course, when the time came, I surprised her again with my overwhelming generosity and love for her by buying her a horse. Really, that was about the last time I had to have a conversation with her about anything. I hardly even see her. I don't have anyone to explain anything to.....and she's sometimes gone long enough that if she sees something new around the house I can tell that she's really not sure if it was there the last time she was home or not. For my part, I have faked a horrifying fear of horses since the first day she invited me "up to the stable". I made up a story about being kicked by a horse when I was a kid. I told her that for her I would try again to see if I could overcome it......and you can bet your arse I put on a brave front....but it was not to be. The fear is overwhelming. It's even worse than my cat alllergy. All in all, horses have improved the quality of my life. and this is the story about how we all got blackmail information on LB....see you at nats |
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|  Started by Fred DViews: 1464 Posts: 21 | ||
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